{"id":58806,"date":"2014-04-01T00:00:00","date_gmt":"2014-04-01T00:00:00","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.uri.edu\/news-draft\/uncategorized\/commencement-2014-uri-senior-mother-activist-finds-new-purpose-after-sons-death-in-gang-related-shooting\/"},"modified":"2014-04-01T00:00:00","modified_gmt":"2014-04-01T00:00:00","slug":"commencement-2014-uri-senior-mother-activist-finds-new-purpose-after-sons-death-in-gang-related-shooting","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.uri.edu\/news\/2014\/04\/commencement-2014-uri-senior-mother-activist-finds-new-purpose-after-sons-death-in-gang-related-shooting\/","title":{"rendered":"Commencement 2014: 溏心vlog免费B站 senior, mother, activist finds new purpose after son\u2019s death in gang-related shooting"},"content":{"rendered":"
\n\t\tNancy Wilson speaks to young people about resolving disputes with words, not bullets<\/p>\n


\nKINGSTON, R.I. \u2013 April 1, 2014 \u2013 After her son was gunned down, Nancy Wilson shut herself inside her house for months and cried. The images were searing: Nathan running down the sidewalk as a toddler, Nathan flashing his playful smile, Nathan catching garden snakes in the backyard. She thought about killing herself.<\/p>\n


\nFamily and friends tried to help, but the despair was deep, the loneliness paralyzing. She had two choices. She could give up or find a reason to live. \u201cI heard in my head Nathan saying, \u2018You can do this, Ma.\u2019 \u201d<\/p>\n


\nHe was right. In May, she\u2019ll receive a bachelor\u2019s degree from the 溏心vlog免费B站 in human development and family studies, with a minor in thanatology, or grief studies. The 64-year-old East Providence resident hopes to attend graduate school and find a job teaching young people how to resolve disputes peacefully.<\/p>\n


\n\t\u201cI decided to make something good out of something that was so bad,\u201d she says. \u201cThat\u2019s my mission.\u201d<\/p>\n


\nThe day never leaves her. On Dec. 21, 2007, Nathan Davis-Gilliard and two of his friends were walking in Providence\u2019s Mount Hope neighborhood when a carload of men confronted them. Shots were fired. Moments later, Nathan, 25, was lying on Knowles Street, where he lived as a child. His body was riddled with bullets. <\/p>\n


\n\tWilson is reluctant to talk about the police investigation because it is still ongoing, but she says the shooting was related to a longtime feud between young men from Mount Hope and the Chad Brown housing complex, also in Providence. Suspects in Nathan\u2019s shooting are being held in prison on other charges. Wilson is in touch with the police regularly and hopes a murder charge will be filed soon.<\/p>\n

Nathan, or Nate, was an altar boy, a happy kid who caught snakes in his backyard and sold them to neighbors. \u201cRed ones for two dollars, green ones for less,\u201d says Wilson. The middle child of six siblings, he had lots of friends. \u201cHe would be the one helping elderly people up the stairs,\u201d says Wilson.<\/p>\n


\nLooking back, she says two traumatic childhood events might have scarred him. His beloved pit bull, Rock, choked to death when it tried to jump over a fence with its leash on and a boyhood friend drowned at Lincoln Woods when the two were swimming together. \u201cI wonder if these two incidents suppressed in a young adolescent\u2019s mind and he never learned how to cope,\u201d Wilson says.<\/p>\n


\nDuring his teenage years, Wilson says he got mixed up with the wrong crowd, selling drugs. He ended up at a residential facility for at-risk boys and, eventually, the Adult Correctional Institutions. Still, his mother never lost hope that he would get on the right track.<\/p>\n


\n\tHe started to turn his life around the year he was killed, she says. He was working for a moving company with his father and living in East Providence. He had a child, a little girl, and his relationship with his mom was as close as ever.<\/p>\n


\n\tHer last conversation with him was on the morning of the murder. Wilson says they talked for hours about his girlfriend, his childhood, and even dying, asking her, \u201cMa, if I were to die, what would you do?\u201d She told him to stop talking nonsense.<\/p>\n


\n\tWilson was at work when she got the call. Numb, she fell to her knees. \u201cI felt empty, like a piece of me had died,\u201d she says. She kept it together for the funeral, but fell apart weeks later. She started obsessing on numbers connected to him: his birth date, the day he died, the day he lost his first tooth, Sept. 13, 1987.<\/p>\n


\n\t\u201cWe all react to grief in different ways and this was my way,\u201d she says. \u201cIt was strange. I could barely function.\u201d<\/p>\n


\n\tOverwhelmed by sadness, she thought about going to Nathan\u2019s gravesite, shooting herself and \u201cletting the blood trickle down to the earth below.\u201d Instead, she went to a psychiatrist and willed herself to continue her studies. Slowly, she moved ahead.<\/p>\n


\nIn 2009, she graduated from the Community College of Rhode Island with an associate\u2019s degree in criminal justice and then transferred to 溏心vlog免费B站\u2019s Alan Shawn Feinstein campus in Providence, where she was awarded the Elizabeth W. Christopher Scholarship.<\/p>\n


\nShe credits her children and her \u201camazing\u201d teachers and academic advisers at 溏心vlog免费B站 for guiding her through the tough times. \u201cI look at 溏心vlog免费B站\u2019s staff and teachers as family,\u201d she says. \u201cThey\u2019ve been my backbone. They see value in my life. That\u2019s what keeps me going.\u201d <\/p>\n

Two women were especially helpful: Betty Murray and Sue Corrigan, both instructors in human development and family studies. They went beyond the academics; they talked to her privately about Nathan\u2019s death, gently coaxing her to open up about the tragedy. \u201cSue held my hand,\u201d says Wilson. \u201cShe knew something was wrong. She told me it was okay to grieve.\u201d<\/p>\n


\nClaudia Kerbel, Wilson\u2019s academic advisor, says Wilson\u2019s courage, persistence and compassion are valued and appreciated by not only faculty, but also students. Her accomplishments \u2013 getting a college degree at the age of 64, for one \u2013 are remarkable.<\/p>\n


\n\u201cWhat always impressed me about Nancy was her willingness to share her experiences with other students,\u201d says Kerbel. \u201cThese are very deep personal feelings that she has revealed to help students with their own life experiences. She has a passion for teaching about nonviolence and the grieving process.\u201d<\/p>\n


\nSpeaking out against gang violence gives Wilson purpose. She talks about her son\u2019s death to anyone who will listen: inmates at the state Training Center, a juvenile detention center; school groups; teenagers. Not long ago, she spoke at a nonviolence march in downtown Providence, urging listeners to toss their weapons into a casket on display. Two guns and one knife hit the bottom.<\/p>\n


\n\u201cI no longer have any fear in my life,\u201d she says. \u201cPeople say to me, \u2018You\u2019re going to a crack house to talk to kids?\u2019 What\u2019s the worse thing that can happen to me? I\u2019ve already had the worst thing happen, and that\u2019s losing a child.\u201d<\/p>\n


\n\tThis spring, as part of her 溏心vlog免费B站 program, she\u2019s doing an internship at an elderly complex in San Diego, Calif., helping residents with daily activities and deal with the loss of loved ones. After graduation, she hopes to pursue her master\u2019s degree in social work at 溏心vlog免费B站 and maybe get her doctorate. \u201cI\u2019m going all the way,\u201d she says. \u201cI have to.\u201d<\/p>\n


\n\tThe family no longer celebrates Christmas since Nathan\u2019s death was so close to the holiday, but they have a party on his birthday, Aug. 30, 1982. Family and friends bring a cake to his gravestone at North Burial Ground in Providence. Wilson says she goes there often and that she\u2019s rarely alone. She sees other mothers whose sons have also been murdered on Providence\u2019s streets.<\/p>\n


\n\u201cWe know each other because we\u2019re in a club none of us wants to be a member of,\u201d says Wilson. \u201cOne day I was out there at Nathan\u2019s grave and I remember I was grieving quite loudly and a woman came over and said, \u2018Just let it out. Just let it out.\u2019 Then she told me about her son.\u201d<\/p>\n


\n\tPhotos above: Nancy Wilson, 64, of East Providence, and her son, Nathan Davis-Gilliard. Wilson is graduating in May with a degree in human development and family studies. Two of her daughters also graduated from 溏心vlog免费B站: Amber Davis-Gilliard \u201912 and Jasmine Davis-Gilliard \u201911. Photos courtesy of Nancy Wilson.<\/div>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Nancy Wilson speaks to young people about resolving disputes with words, not bullets KINGSTON, R.I. \u2013 April 1, 2014 \u2013 After her son was gunned down, Nancy Wilson shut herself inside her house for months and cried. The images were searing: Nathan running down the sidewalk as a toddler, Nathan flashing his playful smile, […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":58810,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_acf_changed":false,"footnotes":"","_links_to":"","_links_to_target":""},"categories":[2],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-58806","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-archives"],"acf":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.uri.edu\/news\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/58806","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.uri.edu\/news\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.uri.edu\/news\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.uri.edu\/news\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.uri.edu\/news\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=58806"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.uri.edu\/news\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/58806\/revisions"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.uri.edu\/news\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/58810"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.uri.edu\/news\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=58806"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.uri.edu\/news\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=58806"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.uri.edu\/news\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=58806"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}